It's actually around 8:45pm on 13 January, despite this post going up at about 6am on 14 January. By the time you guys see this post, I'll be about 45 minutes from taking my first pregnancy test.
I've been wanting to do this for DAYS, you guys. Seriously, days. Which I'm sure comes as no surprise. ;) DH wanted me to wait until Sunday (11DPO), but I'm actually really anticipating testing tomorrow, when I initially wanted to. I have a couple $tree tests, and I bought some FRERs, too. If I get a positive with the $tree test, then I'll use a FRER to be like "YESSS"... and either way, I'm going to use a FRER tomorrow (Sunday) morning.
**WARNING: These are very deep, emotional thoughts coming up. Please respect this if you're considering commenting with anything that even closely resembles a lecture or "reality check." Thanks.**
When we first started TTC a few weeks ago, I was still a bit ambivalent about getting pregnant. As the days have gone on, and the wait has caused me to become infinitely more anxious, I realized just how much I really wanted to be pregnant and start a family. On my drive home from work, I was considering the possibility of not being pregnant this month (and there's always a chance!), and I actually kind of got choked up.
That reaction, quite frankly... really surprised me. But DH and I have planned extensively for this, and we did so much to ensure that this month sticks. We've invested so much time and energy and emotion into creating a potential child, and I especially have put a lot of research, work, and heart into this process and preparing myself for a potential (and hopeful!) baby. To think it might not work this month? It was a bit overwhelming. And yeah, a little upsetting.
I sure hope it's positive this morning (or tomorrow morning, Sunday). I won't be devastated if it's not, but when DH asked, I answered honestly: "If it's negative tomorrow, I'll be disappointed. If it's negative Sunday? Then I'll be upset."
And we'll move on to the next month, and the next and the next. Until it finally works out.
But god, this first month is wracked with so much emotional fraught.
We'll know soon...
Good luck!!
ReplyDeleteIf you get testing-crazy I still have some leftover super cheap internet tests that you could have!
You serious?! I will pay you for shipping! Or meet up or something. You know, 'cause you're apparently about 20 minutes away, lol. :)
ReplyDeleteEither way!
ReplyDeleteAwesome! :) I'll email you about it, actually.
ReplyDeleteHey,
ReplyDeleteNo judgement here. I'm the same way. After going back and forth about the idea of starting a family, but the time we were both fully committed, I was (and am!) super impatient for results. It's our first month of officially trying as well and I'll be testing later today. Good luck to you with your first test!! I'm thinking positive thoughts for you :)
Thanks, Steph. That means a lot. :) First test was a bust, but I'm only 10DPO and used a $tree test -- I plan on using a much more sensitive test tomorrow, so we'll see how it goes! Best of luck to you with your test today, too!! I'll be thinking of (and crossing my fingers for!) you today. ;)
ReplyDelete<3!!