Confession: I love granny panties.

We were doing laundry one night recently and I started balling up all my underwear to throw into my designated underwear drawer. As I wadded up each pair, I started to notice a trend: While I had lots of pretty undies that I used to wear pre-pregnancy (how do y’all think I got pregnant in the first place?), I seem to have developed a love for granny panties.

Okay, so they’re not that bad. Some of them even have Victoria’s Secret emblazoned across the elastic! But they’re definitely not their cheek-huggers or buttfloss pretties that you kind of want to show off under your blue jeans (whaletail, anyone?). Nope, instead, they’re bikini undies or, seldom found but always treasured when they are, boy shorts.

Others are more along the “granny panty” lines – these, you have to pick up in packs (packs! Like men’s underwear!) at your local Target, all nicely lined up on a wall filled with Fruit of the Loom and Hanes. And they bear names like briefs! Briefs, for chrissake. The only thing that was brief about my underwear collection pre-pregnancy was how long it took for them to ride into my asscrack, and now I’m actively looking for ones that bear the name and refuse to bare my behind.

What happened to me?! All my nice underwear has been regaled to the back of my drawer, seen only when all my comfy undies are dirty and I begrudgingly realize I need to do laundry. I can’t deny, though, that these huge swaths of cloth that I now wear are so ridiculously comfortable that I cringe whenever I get even a glimpse at a thong.

And my bra collection? Let’s not even go there. I’m pretty sure I rotate between two or three, and not a single one even comes close to being considered a “push-up”. More like, “glorified sports bra with hooks for easy boobie access”. For the babe, not my husband. Unfortunately for him.

Let’s face it, though. Motherhood is pretty uncomfortable, considering its early wake-ups, constant stream of pee and poo and spit-up, and having this 15-pound weight hanging off you constantly. While it’s something we moms would never give up in this world, there’s something we can, and that’s uncomfortable underwear.

So adios to wedgies, hello to comfy cotton! This mama’s gone granny panty, and she ain’t turning back now.